Tag: mixed drinks

My Best Old Fashioned

This is the best Old Fashioned I’ve ever made, so I’m going to give my recipe to anyone who cares.

  • 1/2 ounce maple syrup
  • Angostura bitters
  • 2 ounces bourbon
  • 2 splashes lemon juice
  • Club soda
  • Orange peel
  • Ice

First, take an old-fashioned glass and chill it. Add ice (I have a mold from Corkcicle that makes bubble- and crack-free ice balls, so I place one of those ice balls in the glass).

Around the ice, wrap the peel of a small orange (like a cutie or halo) after rubbing the peel to bring out the oils. Keep the glass in the freezer while completing the following steps.

Add 1/2 ounce of maple syrup (real, of course), 2 splashes of lemon juice (pure, without preservatives), and three splashes of bitters to a shaker.

Add 2 ounces of bourbon (I’ve found recently that I like Old Forester, which is relatively cheap but drinkable and mixes well).

With a bar spoon, stir all ingredients with ice until ice-cold. Splash club soda into the frosted glass and strain the drink mixture in after it. Top with additional club soda to taste and serve.

Edit: I originally posted this with liters instead of ounces, lol.

The Old Fashioned

To prove that we (or I, rather) live in a solipsistic universe and that the rest of you don’t exist, I recently learned of the existence of the Old Fashioned, a simple cocktail that lays claim (truly or not) to being the original cocktail. I thought it sounded really good and have been wanting one, and then I saw that a lot of people on my social media feeds were drinking them.

I needed to join in, so I bought a bottle of aromatic bitters and tried a few experiments.

The Old Fashioned pictured here is simple: I made it with brown sugar doused in bitters and dissolved in a spoonful of water. Then I added two shots of Maker’s Mark and some orange peel, and stirred with ice.

I’m quite pleased with the result: The bourbon still stands out, but the bit of water, flavoring, and sweetener takes away the “burn” typical of neat or on-the-rocks whiskey.

This may become my go-to drink.

Still working to perfect my Bloody Mary recipe

Magical Girl Mixed Drinks!

See? I’m not the only one doing it.

A few days ago, I amused myself by inventing magical girl-themed mixed drinks (all are untested, so create at your own risk), except the Madoka is basically a ripoff of a standard Baby Guinness, only with Cannon Shot.

But I’m not alone. Kyla M. Covert beat me to it by creating the Magical Girl, a cocktail involving viniq, prosecco, and cranberry juice. I don’t even know what those are. Well, except for the cranberry juice … okay, viniq is apparently moscato with vodka. That sounds appropriately disgusting. Maybe not as disgusting as what I suggested for the Utena, but still.

Unlike me, Covert actually tested her creation. Here’s the result:

Reasonably classy.

It looks okay. It’s probably pretty sweet, but it really shouldn’t be called “the Magical Girl” unless it’s cloying and gross.

Speaking of which, if you really want outrageous girly drinks that will cause heart palpitations or possibly fits of rage in anyone with a Y-chromosome or a modicum of respect for alcohol, you totally have to check out the abomination known as a “unicorn.” As described on a blog inappropriately called Kidspot, a unicorn is an alcoholic beverage made with such ingredients as ice cream, milk, and cotton candy. And there’s booze in there someplace.

So, do you eat the cotton candy first, or do you push it into the drink, or … ?

This is apparently something of a trend, as Kidspot reports several bars with several variations on this diabetes-inducing creation.

Eww.

So there you go. Now we know what magical girls drink on their down time. As for me? I’m gonna go crack open a beer.

 

The Madoka

Initially sweet, it soon turns sharp and bitter

Pour Cannon Blast into a shot glass. Carefully pour Irish creme down the side of the glass until it forms a white “head” on top of the dark liquor.

Initially sweet and creamy, followed by a strong citrus taste and a sharp burn of ginger in the throat. Pairs well with heavily implied homoeroticism. Drink until you suffer.

The Tutu

A royal drink that will keep you on your toes

Pour vodka, Malt Duck, and coconut rum over ice in a tall, chilled glass. Over the back of a spoon, slowly pour in the Coole Swan to produce a layered “head” effect. Garnish with mint.

Initially chocolatey and creamy, but quickly becomes tangy and strong with a coconut aftertaste. Pairs well with wine and pizza. Drink until you can’t dance and feel like marrying your cat.

The Pretty Cure Double Shot

If sobriety is a disease, this is the cure

Shake ingredients together with ice until cold. Strain into double shot glass.

Strong shot with faint fruity notes. Pairs well with your best friend. Drink until you see rainbows and feel ready to fight.

The Sailor Moon

A refreshing blend of love and justice

Mix ingredients together in a blender. Blend until smooth. Pour into a chilled collins glass rimmed with sugar. Garnish with fruit wedges as desired.

Refreshing summer beverage with sweet, fruity taste of raspberries and citrus. Keep away from young girls, who may mistake it for juice. Pairs well with steamed pork buns. Drink until you cry and fall down.

The Utena

A revolution in mixed drinks

*

Stir ingredients with ice for thirty seconds and filter into a cold martini glass. Garnish with one pink raspberry and one purple raspberry skewered on a sword-shaped toothpick.

Round mouthfeel with bright fruity notes and a spicy aftertaste hinting of strawberries, mint, and lust. Pairs well with asparagus sandwiches. Drink irresponsibly before experimenting with homosexuality or incest.

* (actually a picture of a Beefeater Summer Martini)