In a Dream

Featured image: Something in Japanese.

The premise of Jake and the Dynamo came to me in a dream.

I think I had been watching Shugo Chara!, the anime based on Peach-Pit’s classic magical girl manga, before I went to bed, so that was probably the impetus, but I had a dream about a high-schooler who got sent back to fifth grade because of an error on his transcript. There, a little girl picked on him, and he couldn’t do anything about it because she was just a kid.

When I woke up, I thought that was a really funny idea, but I couldn’t think of anything to do with it. I mulled it over for a few days and finally said, “Well, what if she’s a magical girl?”

Pretty Dynamo, complete with name, look, and a basic idea of her powers, popped immediately into my head.

So there you go.

JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Bio 6: Jake Blatowski

NAME: Jake Blatowski
CURRENT AGE: 14
THREAT LEVEL COMPETENCY: N/A
MAGITECH: None

“I can’t stand magical girls.”

Living in the relatively peaceful Juban District on the edge of Urbanopolis, Jake Blatowski has spent his life at a distance from the city’s perpetual monster attacks. Having never needed magical girls to defend him, he is annoyed by others’ obsession with them.

Convinced of his own maturity, Jake is eager to try out for the basketball team when he enters his first year of high school, but after a computer glitch erases part of his transcript, the school system in its wisdom sends him back—to fifth grade! Continue reading “JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Bio 6: Jake Blatowski”

JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Chapter 2

Enter the Dynamo: Who is this mysterious girl … and why is she such a jerk?

JAKE AND THE DYNAMO

CHAPTER 2: ENTER THE DYNAMO

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When Jake got up in the morning, monsters and magical girls were in the news again.

He dressed in his brand new school uniform and checked himself out in the mirror. This was his first time in a suit. It couldn’t quite hide his gangly frame, but it looked sharp enough, if a little stuffy for his taste. He untucked his shirt, loosened his tie, opened his top button, and folded the French cuffs over the jacket sleeves—yes, that was better. He quickly ran his fingers through his mussed black hair before he slouched downstairs and landed in his seat at the breakfast bar. Leaning across the bar, he watched his mother, who, clad in a frilly apron, fried up breakfast. With a sweet smile, she slid a steaming plate of eggs and toast in front of him. Meanwhile, his father, coffee in one hand and a folded newspaper in the other, sat on the loveseat and hunched toward the television. The light of the TV played against his thick spectacles. Continue reading “JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Chapter 2”

The Jake and the Dynamo Messenger Code

… I don’t even know what that is.  But it kind of looks cool:

I like the circly thingy.
I like the circle thingy.

This is in some mysterious fashion linked with the new Facebook page for Jake and the Dynamo. I think you can scan it with your phone using the Messenger app. You might have to print it first.

Back in my day, things you scan with your phone were square and looked like mazes. You kids these days have it easy, what with your pictures and circle thingies.

As an added note, Chapter 2, of Jake and the Dynamo, “Enter the Dynamo,” will appear this coming Monday, just in time for Mother’s Day … at least if you like to get your mom things like free ebook chapters because you’re some kind of cheapskate tightwad who doesn’t appreciate his parents.

Chocolate and flowers, dammit. That’s what your mother wants, not magical girl ebook chapters! Believe me, I know this.

Because she told me last night.

Zing.

Oh, by the way, like our Facebook page. I promise not to talk about your mom.

Meet Your Magical Girls! JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Bio 5: Sword Seamstress

CODENAME: Magical Girl Sword Seamstress
ALTER EGO: [redacted]
FAMILIAR: Stitches the Ragdoll cat
CURRENT AGE: 13
THREAT LEVEL COMPETENCY: 8.3
MAGITECH: Sewing-based

“A stitch in time stops crime!”

The haughty yet superbly fashionable Sword Seamstress is one of the most admired and effective magical girls in all of Urbanopolis. Some maintain that she is second only to Pretty Dynamo herself.

She slays monsters by the dozens. More importantly, she does it with class. Continue reading “Meet Your Magical Girls! JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Bio 5: Sword Seamstress”

JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Chapter 1

The First Test: Can three young girls stop an implacable enemy with powers beyond human ken?

“It is rare that one can see in a little boy the promise of a man, but one can almost always see in a little girl the threat of a woman.” —Alexandre Dumas

JAKE AND THE DYNAMO

CHAPTER 1: THE FIRST TEST

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On the desolate slope of a craggy mountain where no snow fell and no flowers grew, a high castle of black basalt stood resilient against the biting, howling wind. Deep in the castle’s bowels, the Dark Queen, mistress of all that is base and wicked, reclined upon her throne. Leaning an alabaster cheek on the palm of one hand while she slid the carefully manicured fingers of the other along the generous curve of her hip, she ran a forked tongue across her blood-red lips. Continue reading “JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Chapter 1”

JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Starts Tomorrow!

“If you have a taste for cartoon satire, magical girls, and bloody violence, then you may find this story is for you.” —Starbat

jake_and_the_dynamo_finished_by_starbat-da08stb
Cover by Starbat

In the near future, most of the universe has decided that humanity needs to die. Decimated by alien invasions, primordial monsters, demons from hell, and abominations from beyond space and time, mankind’s last remnants have gathered together under the protection of the benevolent Moon Princess … but what was supposed to be a last refuge is instead a perpetual war zone.

Fortunately, the forces of goodness have given us a small advantage—by granting random superpowers to emotionally volatile young girls.

In the midst of these upheavals, fourteen-year-old Jake Blatowski just wants to live a normal life, but fate will instead place him in the path of the city’s most electrifying protectress, Magical Girl Pretty Dynamo. Worse yet, the monsters’ formerly random attacks have begun to exhibit a pattern: they’re all aimed at him!

Now all that stands between Jake Blatowski and certain death at the hands of ravenous monsters is an eleven-year-old girl.

And that’s just too bad for the monsters.

JAKE AND THE DYNAMO

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Meet Your Magical Girls! JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Bio 4: Tuneless Ramona

CODENAME: Magical Girl Tuneless Ramona
ALTER EGO: Ramona Kawasaki
FAMILIAR: None
CURRENT AGE: 12
THREAT LEVEL COMPETENCY: ∞
MAGITECH: Musical

“With the power of incredible songs that would make me a world-famous pop diva if only someone would recognize my talent!”

There are only two things that can frighten a citizen of mankind’s final city. One is a monster attack. The second is Magical Girl Tuneless Ramona.

Ramona Kawasaki is an unusual magical girl: she has no familiar and no contract. One night, she went out with her friends and sang karaoke. Her singing was so horrific, she spontaneously generated a powerful field of negative musical energy that transformed her into Tuneless Ramona.  She has never transformed back. Continue reading “Meet Your Magical Girls! JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Bio 4: Tuneless Ramona”

Meet Your Magical Girls! JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Bio 3: Rifle Maiden

CODENAME: Magical Girl Rifle Maiden
ALTER EGO: Unknown
FAMILIAR: Bossy the Holstein
CURRENT AGE: 15
THREAT LEVEL COMPETENCY: 6.4
MAGITECH: Gunnery

“Magical Girl Rifle Maiden atcher service.”

Not much is known about Rifle Maiden. Armed with a rifle and a pair of revolvers, she can fire explosive bolts or stun blasts, and apparently never runs out of ammunition.  However, her energy consumption is quite high, as she has difficulty sustaining power in prolonged combat without a steady supply of juice boxes.

Rifle Maiden is most effective when she teams up with other girls; fortunately, a sunny and straightforward personality enables her to befriend her fellow magical girls easily. In recent days, many have observed her working closely with Voodoo Queen Natasha. Continue reading “Meet Your Magical Girls! JAKE AND THE DYNAMO Bio 3: Rifle Maiden”