I will not be seeing Star Wars: The Last Mary Sue, just in case anyone might have thought to ask. The special editions deeply wounded my enthusiasm for Star Wars, and the prequels killed it. I don’t expect the House of Child Molestation Mouse to be capable of treating the franchise with any respect, and all the buzz I’ve heard about the sequels and spinoffs has been consistently negative.

The very fact that the sequels’ creators have decided to make Star Wars about Grrrl Power shows that they don’t understand the original films. Taking what is at heart a boys’ adventure serial and girl-powering it up is as tin-eared as redoing Ghostbusters with an all-female cast, or redoing Sailor Moon with an all-male cast.

And by the way, there is, in fact, a version of Sailor Moon with an all-male cast, but it’s done as a self-aware joke. That’s one of the differences between America and Japan: in Japan, they say, “Ha! We took your beloved franchise and gender-swapped it! Isn’t that FUNNY?” But in America, they say, “Ha! We took your beloved franchise and gender-swapped it! And if you don’t like it, you’re a BIGOT!”

I am reminded of an interview with Patrick Rothfuss from a few years back, in which he said he found it, and I quote, “fucking creepy” (these writers are so eloquent) that The Hobbit has no female characters in it. That’s where we’re at now; we have a generation that doesn’t simply dislike boys’ adventure fiction, but actually can’t comprehend it. He doesn’t merely say that he finds The Hobbit not to be his cup of tea; he finds it creepy. It’s an adventure story for boys about a group of boys who go on an adventure, and Rothfuss can’t wrap his head around it.

Similarly, I remember an argument I had a few years back with some bronies who were grousing that My Little Pony doesn’t have enough male characters in it. I patiently explained to them that it was a cartoon for little girls. They didn’t get it.

The original Star Wars trilogy is about a farmboy who discovers he’s a prince (of sorts) with a great destiny, and who rescues a princess and saves the galaxy. It’s a boys’ adventure story in space. Those who’ve tackled the franchise since then (Lucas himself included) don’t understand that, and they may be incapable of understanding that.

That’s where we’re at. Just look at this comment:

I especially love the part where he says the movie “backs love over hate” after saying it “mocks and burns down.” Note also that he says nothing about whether the film is well-written or well-directed or entertaining. All he cares about is whether he sees his politics in it.

Note also that he speaks of mocking and burning down traditions with the assumption that this must be a good thing. He doesn’t pause to ask, or describe, exactly what traditions it mocks or burns down, nor does he ask, or describe, why those traditions deserve to be burned down. He simply assumes that mocking and burning are good, and traditions are bad, and if you think otherwise, why, you must have voted for Trump.

This too reminds me of something. Some years ago, I saw Luc Besson’s pro-pedophilia movie The Professional, starring a skin-crawlingly sexualized twelve-year-old Natalie Portman. Afterwards, I went looking for movie reviews. I don’t remember how many I read, but I read only one that condemned the film for glamorizing child-molestation. The rest praised the movie for being “subversive”—assuming, again, that subversion is good in and of itself, without pausing to ask what is being subverted, or whether that thing should be subverted.

So that’s where we’re at. But at least we are seeing greater honesty now than we did ten or more years ago: they are openly admitting that they want to burn it all down. Men like Baz McAlister didn’t used to state their intent so plainly.

  • LorenzoCanuck

    Are you really going to trust the word of some ultra-progressive snob to accurately describe something? That’s like listening to all those people who think LotR is about pagan overtones.

    I’ve seen Episode VII and Rogue One. You have a point about Rey being poorly written in the former film, but the concept itself is not inherently offensive: the Wasteland Girl who discovers higher aspirations is a fairly established trope now, and the feminism (if you can call it that) isn’t really anymore pushy than, say, Wonder Woman which I recall you liked. The fact that a female protagonist uses violence to achieve her goals isn’t what makes a film a paean to “Grrl Power” but rather the ideological framework that it takes place in, which is not present in the films despite what the progressives say (if you want to see /that/, you can see it in whatever weirdness Marvel’s comics line is up to nowadays).

    Don’t let the SJWs define what you should enjoy. Their worldview is geared towards looking for “woke” themes in everything, anyway, so why should their word count in particular?

    • Still haven’t seen Wonder Woman, but I heard only good things about it.

      Still haven’t seen Episode VII. Still haven’t seen Rogue One. Like I said, my Star Wars enthusiasm is dead.

  • UncleverHans

    Your satirical title is misleading. We both know that Rey won’t be the last Mary Sue to grace the silver screen.

    Regardless, have fun pouting in the corner. It stuff blows up and people get shot, then that’s really all I need to enjoy a Star Wars movie.

  • Terrycloth

    There’s a bit of obvious girl power (all the rebel leaders are women for some reason) but the main thing it subverts is desperate heroism as a strategy (ala death star trench run). Poe Dameron tries to be the hero over and over and basically makes everything worse every time.

    Rey doesn’t really save the day either, though. No one does. The day is not saved. The First Order wins. Er, spoiler.

  • Hrodgar

    Re: UncleverHans
    If all you want is explosions and shooting, then surely there are films which include those that AREN’T made by enemies of virtue and truth, as Disney has repeatedly indicated they have become? Also refusing and attempting to persuade others to refuse to give money for or waste time on products made by such people is hardly the same as pouting.

    Re: LorenzoCanuck
    It’s not just the ultra-progressives that think that. Brian Neimeier ( certainly doesn’t fit the bill. Also, just because some folks have misread evil themes into one work doesn’t mean they aren’t actually present in another. Plus, Marvel and Star Wars are both owned by the same company that put sodomitical propaganda into Beauty and the Beast not all that long ago; we should expect them to be heading in similar directions with their other properties, even if they are, perhaps, not as far advanced.
    Re: Both of the above
    If you think the film was not encouraging unhealthy or evil ideas and actions, then make that case. But I know I have enjoyed many things that I ought not have: “…that’s really all I need to enjoy…” and “don’t let the SJW’s define what you enjoy” are beside the point.